Events that shape us - Bad week for me

[EagerNoSkill]

This is always a lousy emotional week for me.... you think you can shake some stuff over time .... but something you cant!
I guess these are the events that shape our psyche and emotional responses and make us who and what we are.

My Parents
18 Jan 1978 my parents were both killed when the plane my dad was flying hit a mountain in the 6 seater Beechcraft Bonanza in the Natal Midlands.
The hit the mountain about 20 feet from crest. My dad was 31 - my mom 29.
We found out 8 years later in a court case that air traffic control had given my dad the wrong descent instructions and had "instructed/guided" them into the mountain.
I was the oldest of 3 boys - I had turned 10 about 5 weeks before - so my carefree childhood had come to rapid and grinding halt. Our life paths had changed irrevocably!
My dad's mom's then took us in and raised my 2 brothers (One was 9 the youngest 7).

My Gran
My gran was an absolutely amazing lady .. the tales I could tell! She died 13 Jan 1993 of heart attack age 72.
I had just literally come back from an 6 weeks advanced swat / anti-terrorism training course in the Police and had seen my Gran/Mom.
She had a heart attack that night and after getting her to hospital we were told at 4 am she had passed over.

I reported for duty that morning at 09:00 - in rough Johannesburg/Hillbrow police station - not a happy bloke! My new W/O at my new station took one look at me and immediately said
"2 weeks leave - no paperwork - go!" I owe that man big time for compassion beyond words!

My Lesson / Reminder
Anyway this forum is my release valve / vent - so sorry about the purge!
Just needed a safe place to let it go - cant always dump this on family!

These events serve/need to remind us of the fragility of life, value of family and friends. That some days to day the events/worries that can consume so much of our time and energy are minor matters that can pale into nothing into heartbeat!

[dromia]

Our life is the sum total of our past.

[Watcher]

Sharing cares with friends is the only way to deal them; God bless.

[EagerNoSkill]

Pic of Plane, newspaper article, and Crash Site

Corrections - they were about 20/30 meters under crest
Dad was 33 - Mom 28

One more detail - my dad was flying at night and could not see the mountain due to the dark countryside, clouds etc - they had no background contrast!
The direction from ATC was what they had to rely upon.
Small radar units for light planes only started coming out in the 1980's

The crash site photo's (i have about 10) I only found after my Gran died - she had hidden them from us!

[Sandgroper]

ENS,
I know what you mean. My Nan's birthday was 3 days before mine and without fail I'd get a card from her, wherever I was. But ever since she died, my birthday has been a fairly hollow day for me and even now I still can't bring myself to remove her details from my Skype account.

[bobbob]

ENS.
I read your post this morning at work, not a place to be seen getting emotional
I came home. Bnz had read it too, we chatted about it. As Bnz said, he found it hard enough to deal with losing both his parents within 18 months of each other while in his 50's so doesn't know how you must have felt.

Sandgroper.
I too find my birthday difficult. I shared it with my dad.

I spent a lovely afternoon on Sunday with my mum and some old friends. There were six of us, three were widows. Boy did we have some laughs. One friend was absent. She too is a widow but has not managed to move on. She makes plans but then just can't follow them through.

Some learn to carry on.

ENS, we are thinking of you.

[rjn]

my thoughts are with you

russell

[20series]

Tim

Sorry for your loss at such an early age sign01 that must have been hard beyond words!!

but no apologies needed for venting on here :goodjob: I am acutely aware that for most of the last year my somewhat turbulant time has been splurged for all to see just so I had got it out my system!! the words of help and encouragement made a huge impact on me and I'm eternally greatful.

Our life is the sum total of our past.

I couldn't agree more :goodjob:

Alan

[EagerNoSkill]

Thanks everyone for the good wishes .... to all!!

It just wrenches - my youngest is now 10 and I go wow ... I was that age when it happened!

That said.... we have new families to be proud of .. good health to be grateful for and true friends aplenty to help ease the burdens and share the laughter!

We smile and we celebrate and we live like there is now tomorrow!

Thank you!

ENS

[ovenpaa]

That said.... we have new families to be proud of .. good health to be grateful for and true friends aplenty to help ease the burdens and share the laughter!

We smile and we celebrate and we live like there is now tomorrow!

Wise words Tim.